I had a bad dream last night in which, having finally had enough, I looked at the antagonist and I said, “you're a bad dream. Good-bye.” And I woke up.

I woke up to a bad dream.

I woke up to a bad dream from which I cannot wake up. I woke up to a bad dream in which I cannot say “Good-bye.” I woke up to a bad dream in which the antagonist won't just go away. And let's be honest, even if he did go away, there is another one waiting in the wings. Today's antagonist only believes he is consequential. And let's be really honest, even if we did manage to maneuver a protagonist into a more advantageous position of power, today's hero is often tomorrow's villain.

Fear. Sadness. Anger. Common emotions experienced in a bad dream. Insecurity. Exasperation. Disgust. Disappointment. Despair. But I am uncertain. Do these feelings reflect my interpretation? Or do these feelings reflect my true nature? Am I the receiver victimized by others? Or am I the giver generating and/or perpetuating onward and outward? Is the bad dream perhaps a glimpse into the thing itself? Is my nature such that I am the antagonist? Is our nature such that we are the villain? As a Nation? As all of Humanity?

Perhaps.

But even so, evolution is revolution. Our hope must be an active hope. We must become. Better Listeners. Reasoned Architects. Cohesive Builders. Caring Healers. Compassionate Caretakers. To save us. We must become. One.

For many, this is antithetical. So for all of us, it may not be possible. I recognize this possibility of impossibility. I understand the ingrained, entrenched necessity of disunity. But still, I want to wake up from this bad dream. So still, I will work.

In this moment, we are smarter. In the next moment, we must be smarter, quicker.

In this moment, we are few. In the next moment, we must be exponential.

In this moment, we are many. In the next moment, we must be One.

If in this moment we are comfortable, in the next moment we must embrace hardship.

If in this moment we suffer, in the next moment we must embrace even more hardship.

And if in this moment we seek comfort, in the next moment we will uncomprehendingly be embraced by hardship.

So still, I will work.

I have found that to work, to embrace hardship on one's own terms, is not necessarily preferable to having it thrust upon oneself, but it does create a greater potential for productivity and progress.

I have found that to work, to embrace hardship on one's own terms, is not necessarily preferable to having it thrust upon oneself, but it does create a greater potential for destructive tyranny.

Bullies and despots frequently believe destructive tyranny to be productive progress. Influential public servants frequently believe destructive tyranny to be a lesson from history books. Do these beliefs merely reflect wishful thinking? Or do these beliefs reflect full-blown delusion? Are the roles completely interchangeable? Or are the roles merely overlapping? Is the bad dream perhaps a glimpse into the thing itself? Is my nature such that I am the bureaucrat? Is our nature such that we are the system? As an arrangement? As all of Civilization?

Perhaps.

To remember that evolution is revolution, will remind us that quiescence is acquiescence; it will remind us that though nonconformity is seen as a deformity, nonconformity is in actuality an adaptive and necessary mutation; and it will remind us that the way we've always done things will continue to stunt our growth.

Which path will we choose?

Many (and perhaps most) choose by not choosing. The path of least resistance has been cleared in such a way to keep me on the straight and narrow, occupied with busy work created to maintain status quo.

Along with bullies and despots and tyrants and influential public servants, those on the other side of the wealth gap and many of those who can see the other side of the wealth gap, have a vested interest in keeping the path of least resistance, the path of least resistance. Unfortunately, these architects of Humanity's future are also choosing by not choosing. We have selected these architects using a system birthed and living its whole life on the path of least resistance. These architects have not trained to be architects. These architects have been groomed to be galvanic, prepossessed keepers of the path of least resistance.

Fear. Sadness. Anger. As the wealth and power gap widens, at least for us on this side, this path of least resistance seems to be bristling with more and more adversity. I believe most of us, no matter which side of any divide we are on, can see this uptick in hardship. I also believe that most of us have become quite adept at administering anesthetic (to oneself and to others) to deaden the pain.

Consumerism is an anesthetic. Bureaucracy is an anesthetic. Rhetorical platitudes, promising reassurances, exaggerations, bombast, bluster and brazen fabrications all contain anesthetizing agents. (Using the measure, All of Humanity past, present and future), disproportionate recognition, credit and self-congratulations are anesthetics. Busy work is an anesthetic. Two (maybe three) of the seven deadly sins are anesthetics. Drama is an anesthetic. Social media is an anesthetic. Partisanship is an anesthetic.

I am struggling to come out from under. Many of us are struggling to come out from under. There is pain. There is nausea. There is the desire for more anesthetic. And there are keepers at the ready willing to oblige.

Which path will I choose?

Which path will we choose?

The outlook is grim. And because the outlook is grim, many of us will continue down the path of least resistance.

But still, I want to wake up from this bad dream.

So still, I will work.