Imagine 'Fear' as a living, breathing, corporeal entity. Many days, many of us are able to avert our eyes, or turn and go in a different direction, thus ignoring Fear; pushing it to the back of the mind as if it were not there. But if Fear could nod and smile in passing; or walk up and shake your hand; or sit by you at lunch; or come up from behind and sling an arm around your shoulders, laughing heartily at the joke you just made...

I imagine Fear as an androgynous male; generic; vanilla; nondescript; yet strikingly noticeable. You may imagine him or her as a personification of feelings and thoughts from within (those both close to the surface and deeper within); or you may imagine him or her as threats and challenges outside of yourself and (likely) outside of your control; or you may imagine him or her as an amalgamation of within and without. I am suggesting that you put a face to Fear and imagine him or her as a living, breathing, corporeal entity; someone you must see and interact with on a daily basis.

What are my options?

1. Avoidance - I could continue to avert my eyes and work at avoiding contact, but the ground rules say daily contact. This strategy feels like wasted energy.
2. Naked Fear - I could openly shake and tremble and proclaim my fear of Fear on bended knee with bowed head, asking for mercy. This strategy is truthfully obsequious.
3. Brave Front - I could acknowledge Fear with respect and offer sincere (but often token) resistance, feeling good about my candid approach. This strategy is socially acceptable.
4. Ignorance - I could delude myself into believing that I am protected by laws and fairness and justice and goodness and morality, and that what goes around comes around, and that everything happens for a reason. This strategy is lazy.
5. Worship - I could openly and joyously proclaim my love and adoration of all things Fear is and all things Fear does, creating and/or believing myths and stories that give me comfort in my abject servility. This strategy is an evolutionary step above Naked Fear.
6. Fight - I could fight with passion, reason, compassion, responsibility, and hard work. This strategy will at times result in anger, frustration, and even despair; but at other times may result in goodness, growth, and mutual beneficence.

The reality is that I may choose any one of these strategies to fit a circumstance, but in each decision I should ask - Cui Bono? - Who benefits from this? And it is because of this question that it helps to put a face to Fear. A relationship between myself and another living, breathing, corporeal entity is more readily constructed and deconstructed than a relationship between myself and a faceless (monstrous) concept. I believe I must interact with Fear and I must choose actions and behaviors that are most beneficial to me as an individual and to me as the whole of Humanity. (I must also remember that Fear is an element of Humanity, and as such, deserves a face.)

If it is true that all relationships are symbiotic, then as I am choosing a strategy for interacting with Fear, I need to assess the possibilities: a) one of us will benefit and one of us will be harmed; b) one of us will benefit and one of us will be relatively unaffected; or c) one of us will benefit and one of us will acquire some degree of benefit less than or equal to the other. I believe equal benefit is rare.

I do not want to destroy Fear, and as a living, breathing, corporeal entity I do not believe Fear wants to destroy me.

To analyze the six strategies listed above, I will use a spectrum of negative ten (-10) to positive ten (+10) to respectively reflect maximum harm to maximum benefit.

1. Avoidance - As a general rule, depending on circumstance, I believe the 'Avoidance' strategy has most often left me in the -3 to -5 range, while benefiting Fear to the tune of a +4 to +6.
2. Naked Fear - For me this is not a frequent strategy and if/when utilized it has been an 'extreme' circumstance or completely private (non-public) behavior. When utilized, I believe it has harmed me anywhere from -4 to -8, tempered somewhat by the truthfulness, whereas Fear has benefited in the +5 to +8 range.
3. Brave Front - With this strategy I find myself relatively unaffected (-1 to +1) in many everyday interactions, but if a circumstance continues for a more noticeable span I find myself moving steadily downward and start creating exit strategies somewhere around -4 or -5. Fear wins again, starting at +2 to +4 and gaining ground as I lose ground.
4. Ignorance - I implement this strategy so I may see myself as relatively unaffected (+1) or receiving some degree of benefit (+5), and so I may see Fear as relatively unaffected (+1 to -1) to some degree of harm (-3 to -6). However, objectivity (hindsight) tells me that these numbers are reversed.
5. Worship - The functional reality of this strategy appears to be a win - win with both myself and Fear falling into a +3 to a +9 range. I believe the specific placement on the spectrum depends largely on my degree of uncertainty, and if these skeptical feelings and thoughts are nurtured (as they should be) and continue to develop I move into the negative range of -1 to -9 (or even -10). I believe before one reaches the further limits of harm, this strategy should be disposed of, though this shedding of skin is not always easily done, and can be very painful.
6. Fight - This strategy is all over the board and will approach both extremes, though as symbiosis dictates, one or the other of us will always be in the positive ranges. There will be circumstances where both Fear and I benefit (though typically one of us moreso than the other), there will be circumstances where one of us will be relatively unaffected, and there will be circumstances where one of us will appear to be harmed. To commit to this strategy is to commit to hard work and a daily battle. I would also argue that with the objectivity of hindsight (as maintained in the opposite direction with 'Ignorance') a negative number for myself as judged in the moment could gain ground, and based on the resultant learning and growth, could move into the positive ranges.

It is obvious (at least to me) where I have landed; but as I frequently do, I began thinking and writing uncertain of where I would go. And as I frequently do, I believe I have landed in a good place.