Ticking clock. Can't open my eyes. Stuck somewhere. Dream? Clocks don't tick. Bombs don't tick. Digital world. Time is artificial. Humanity has become. Man-made. I feel deep; in a hole. Subterranean. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Flat. No echo. Eyes closed? Or no light? Must be sleep; otherwise, I would move my arms; feel my eyes; lids. I've read books; seen movies. The dream is real. The world, an illusion. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Can't speak. Can't scream. A sense. Not foreboding; exactly. More like resignation. Or retirement. Forced? Not abandonment; or banishment. Not giving in; or up. Understanding? Maybe; yes; close. Not Truth. Reality. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Peace? No. Not yet. Not ever? Tick. Tick. Crawling; up my arm. Just. Beneath. The surface. I want to ask. Not why. Not how. What is Who; and When is nonsense; not questions. That leaves where. I want to ask Where. I want to emphasize I; not Where. I may not be. Yet I must be. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. If I am not? Where is wandering; lost and aimless. If I could see. If I could touch. Weightless. But no. Physical stupor. Excess gravity. Somnolent clarity. To question; not my existence; but rather, the existence of me. Yesterday; survival. Today; questions. Tomorrow? Enlightenment? No. Too soon. Maybe next week. Or next month. Or never. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tomorrow; reality; and survival. Parasomnia. Choices. To sleep; dreamless. To remain, on the cusp; helpless. To wake; guileless; powerless; defenseless. Ain't nothin' but a party. Bacon-Double please. Tick. Tick; tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Lost. Not existence. Me. To me. Lost. Found? No. Perhaps. Lost is found; found is lost. Thoughts; pinging. Making sparks. Random. Like, rubbing my eyes. Yet I can't. Still prostrate; restrained; vulnerable. No illumination. No shape. No form. Tick. If I could choose; I would. Not to see. To be seen. Not to feel. To be felt. Not to hear; beyond. Tick. Tick. Tick. To be heard. Not to wake. To be awakened. Roused. Stirred. Vivified. Tick; tick. Syncopation. Coherence. Difficult. Effort. To string words. Sentences. Imprisoned. To stay. Sidetracked. This is about me. If. If not. It is about; where. Focus. FOCUS! I am not asleep. Perhaps, I am in-between. That would mean, I should wake soon. To what? No. To where? And will I be there? Or. Am I truly, no more? Thought constructs. Can a thing? Assembled? In the mind? Be no more? If it never was? Existence was tangible before me. Existence will remain after me. My existence is tangible. Concrete. Meaningful. In context. Yet, I am inconsequential. I am a fabrication. I can live with that. But will I? Or will I; continue to insist; that my existence; constitutes; meaning; beyond; my existence? Tick; tick. I am sharper. More coherent. Perhaps I am becoming. More fully; awake. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Have I been, bogged down? By a delusion? Perhaps. Perhaps. Perhaps. I am bogged down; by solitude. Lonely truthfulness? False comfort? Choices. Anger. I should not be angered. Communal prescience. Contradiction. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Anger. Sorrow. Determination. Survival. I think. Therefore I am. Therefore I think I am. Thus constructing delusional complexity. I exist. Stop. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. I exist. Stop. Is the simplicity of existence, enough? It appears. It is not. A shroud of widespread superficiality conceals subterranean realities. Tick. Tick. Pain. Is ownership a myth? In this moment; on the cusp; I feel; I have nothing. To attain. To retain. Hard work. For what? Perhaps; for the sake; of hard work. Perhaps; I own; my effort. Only. After the fact. The moment, is mutual. Nice thoughts. Constructs? Fabrication? Unnecessary complexity? Perhaps. All there is; is the moment. Do thoughts exist, in the moment? Or, do thoughts merely, define a moment? If the latter---(this is difficult)---then, does the moment exist? Or, is it also a construct? If the moment exists; only, in the moment; then, all else is fabrication. Perhaps. The only reality; is deep; in a hole. Subterranean. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Perhaps. My existence. Flat. No echo. No shape. No form. No shadow. No illumination. Deep. In a hole. Subterranean. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Perhaps. That is okay. Simplify. Contribute. Know. Uncertainty. Embrace. Productivity. Infinitesimal. Significant. Contradictions. Choices. Tick. Tick. Tick. I will wake soon. I will choose. Moment-by-moment. My existence. The existence of me. Hardship. Security. I will wake soon. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Deep. Closer to; reality. Wakefulness. Rising to the surface. No. Not yet. How to remember? Wakefulness clouds clarity. Engagement distracts. Seduction. Betrayal. To be led astray. Yet, productivity requires engaged discourse. Dilemma. It is. It is, regrettable, that we cannot meet here. In-between. On the cusp. Deep. In a hole. Subterranean. Shared somnolent clarity. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Resting. Preparing. Tick; tick. Tick. I exist. Stop. I choose. Stop. Determination. Survival. Productivity. Stop. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick...