Clippety-clop.

… A single set of hooves on a cobblestone street. Pleasant; even soothing as it passes by and fades into the distance.

Clippety-clop Clippety-CLOP CLIPPETY-CLOP.

… Many sets of hooves thundering by. Powerful; even frightening as they shake the very ground and leave bystanders breathless.

CLIPPETY-CLOP CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLIPPETY-CLOP CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLIPPETY-CLOP CLIPPETTY-CLOP.

… A stampede bearing down with electrifying brutality. Overwhelming; uncontrollable; portentous.

CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLOP-CLIPPETTY CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLOP-CLIPPETTY CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLOP-CLIPPETTY CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLOP-CLIPPETTY CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLOP-CLIPPETTY CLIPPETTY-CLOP CLOP-CLIPPETTY.

… Two stampeding herds crashing head-on.

1. Emotions; (base; instinctive).
2. Feelings; (identifiable; recognizable; fewer sharp edges).
3. Thoughts.
4. Words.
5. Actions.

Typically this is the process, (in the order listed above), that can lead to a stampede. Insert “serious, contemplative reflection/analysis” somewhere before #4 and you create an opportunity – An opportunity to control potential conflict; whether it be inner conflict or conflict with others. This is true even when the emotions involved are positive.

I believe we can learn and grow from conflict which of course closes the gap on Happiness, but I believe we can find more Truth and Wisdom through conflict resolution.

Resolving inner conflict is a personal exercise handled individually. Resolving conflict with others should be a mutually beneficial exercise incorporating respect, empathetic listening, and tightly-controlled emotions/feelings.

I am not schooled in ‘conflict resolution’ and claim no expertise, but from a perspective of learning and growth it seems that the first step should be to identify and agree on what (specifically) the disagreement is. This should be documented to assist both parties/sides in staying focused and on-track. Once this is done mindsets should be examined. This could be done by allowing each party/side to choose 2 items from the list below that (in combination) best communicates their current stance or mindset:

• I Could Be Wrong.
• You Could Be Wrong.
• I Could Be Wrong.
• You Could Be Wrong.
• I Could Be Wrong.
• You Could Be Wrong.
• I Could Be Wrong.
• You Could Be Wrong.

This selection process must be done with complete uninhibited truthfulness; otherwise resolution will ultimately be thwarted by deception.

The hope is that each party will (truthfully) concede the possibility that they could be wrong (by choosing one of each different item from the list above). Once this step is taken, an avenue for dialogue has been opened. From there each party should be given the opportunity to explain how they could be wrong and how the other party could be wrong, and then with respect, empathetic listening, and controlled emotions, work towards resolution.

If one or both parties choose two ‘You Could Be Wrong’ items, then the disagreement must be re-examined and broken down into smaller increments (documented and agreed upon) in which concessions can be made. Of course, realistically, if a party chooses two ‘You Could Be Wrong’ items and that party is the ultimate decision-maker, then the decision is likely made.

If anyone chooses two ‘I Could Be Wrong’ items (unlikely), then the conflict is also resolved.

Conflict is an opportunity. It is sad that anyone would presume to always know best and bypass that chance to close the gap on Happiness. I know this from experience; but would like to think that I am evolving.